““It is not life that’s complicated, it’s the struggle to guide and control life.”” – F. Scott Fitzgerald, This Side of Paradise
When Cole and I first moved to DC on Christmas Eve of 2017, we were vibrating with excitement. Not only were we moving in together for the first time (romantically, at least), but we were moving to our nation’s capital, getting in the weeds of the hustle and bustle. The energy of this city was palpable.
However, after a few weeks, I still had not found a job I loved and I didn’t know a soul besides Cole for hundreds of miles. While Cole was at work, I would let myself be consumed with stress. Stress of not having a job, a passion, and I let my sense of purpose begin to dwindle. As the threads of my self came undone, as did my confidence and conviction. I was lackluster in my own life. Never having felt this way before, I desperately sought any semblance of solace. Knowledge is always the best armor, even when you’re battling within. After countless hours of reading, listening to Podcasts and talking out where these feelings were coming from, I finally felt free of them and my excitement for our life in DC was exhumed.
Some discoveries I made along this journey:
- A great defense against stress is choosing your thoughts wisely. This doesn’t mean you have to constantly monitor your every thought, if you look for reasons to feel down, you will find them. If you look for reasons to be positive, grateful and happy, you will find them.
- “Don’t let your happiness depend on anything you may lose.” – C.S. Lewis. Realizing that this includes people, as well.
- Write about it! Sometime’s the best person to talk and listen to is yourself. At the end of the day, you know your answer. Journaling is one of the greatest gifts I’ve given myself. I’ve often looked back at previous entries, about how I was feeling in a certain relationship, or my thoughts on a time I was going through something, and it changed my present perspective. It’s the unfiltered, no-bullshit biography of your life, and you are its author.
- “The grass is greener where you water it.” I feel this aligns with living your best life, and living in the now. Do things that make you happy. Have a passion project, visit an art exhibit you’ve been dying to see, grab your boyfriend and explore your city. Personally, that meant to practice gratitude and enjoy every day. In other words: treat yo’self!
Pictured: indulging in sweet treats in Metro Center, DC.